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Slightly Askew Painkiller With Lots of Cannabis


Dipping into my backstock of liquor-based books revealed one which I wrote in 2014, that I hadn’t examined in a while. That book is aptly named “Whiskey Cocktails”. It’s funny to me that I’d be interested in writing a recipe for a cannabis publication that includes Barbados Rum (Foursquare) ,and the makings of a cannabis-infused drink. Slightly more complex drinks featured in my book, such as the Revenge of the Painkiller, were always meant to include cannabis. They didn’t, because no one had really thought of that topic for a book in 2014….


Historically speaking, the buccaneers and pirates who plied the water of the rum-soaked Caribbean used hemp (cannabis) to weave the lines that rose their sails. Tobacco wouldn’t last long under the steamy decks of a sailing vessel; it would mold and rot. Expensive tobacco was usually stored in used rum barrels, supplied by a little known company named Scheer in Amsterdam, who have been in the rum trade for centuries. Every inch of space on a sailing vessel was used for some kind of storage, either liquor or tobacco. Spirits from the old world including wines like Madeira were lashed to the open decks to age, while used casks containing rum would be sent to the bowels of the ship, hopefully away from very thirsty and bored sailors.


Who smoked rope? I’m not completely certain, but hemp was grown to make ropes for sailing vessels. This is a historic fact. The globe could not have been discovered as quickly without something to pull the sails up and down on the masts.

Smoking cannabis? Who would do that?


The Slightly Askew cannabis-infused version of my original take on the classic Painkiller is certainly a means to an end. I called it, and rightfully so, a “Revenge of the Painkiller” with a tiki-like nod of my cap. This is unique in my case, as I don’t drink them any longer, having quit drinking hard liquor (and haven’t suffered a hangover in almost five years).

But this lovely tangle of cannabis-infused basic simple syrup, along with the more identifiable ingredients such as Foursquare Barbados Rum and coconut water ice, takes to the Painkiller mantra with alacrity.


What do I do to make the Cannabis Infused Simple Syrup?

1 cup granulated sugar

1 cup spring water

1 tbsp vegetable glycerin (supercharges the THC)


Simple Syrup Prep:

To start, decarboxylate your cannabis to activate the THC. Decarbing activates the THC; you need heat and time to do this essential task. I love to use the LEVO2 because it has a decarb function and infuse function built right in; no more burnt batches. Just plug and play. Sure, there are many technology solutions available, but you should use the one you like best.


Bring the water to a boil on low heat, and add the sugar and the cannabis if you are using a double boiler. Stir frequently until the sugar is fully dissolved in the water. I like using a complex sugar like Demerara or Turbanado for my cannabis-infused simple syrup, because it has real flavor and funk. Make sure that you strain the cannabis from the simple syrup with a fine strainer. And that glycerine? It makes your cannabis-infused simple syrup really shine.


If you utilize the Levo2 solution, follow the directions on the machine for their recommendations. I usually infuse for about thirty minutes at 140 degrees. Let cool completely, and store in the refrigerator for no more than a week. My usual strength is ¼ ounce per cup of simple syrup as a basic recipe. Full-Strength is 1 ounce per cup. The syrup will be quite potent, so be careful!


Slightly Askew Painkiller is more than the sum of the parts. It’s well balanced and quite delicious. I do recommend that you immediately cease drinking those things called espresso martinis, because a martini is made with gin, not espresso. Have this carefully-made drink instead, it’s much more fun!


Ingredients for two rather strong drinks

4 oz. freshly pulled espresso, cooled

2 oz. Coffee Liqueur- I’m rather fond of Tia Maria

2 oz. Barbados Rum - Use Foursquare…

2 oz. Coconut Cream

2 oz. Pineapple Juice

2 oz. Crushed Pineapple

2 oz. Cannabis-Infused Simple Syrup

Chocolate Mole’ Bitters- spicy cocktail bitters with chocolate and chili peppers Lots of crushed ice made from coconut water- frozen overnight and then crushed in a Lewis Bag, which is a sturdy canvas bag made for wicking the moisture off the ice


Prep:

Pre-chill two parfait glasses with regular ice and water, and pour out the mixture. Add crushed pineapple, top with some crushed coconut water ice

Meanwhile in a Boston Shaker, fill ¾ with regular ice.

Add the all the liquid ingredients.

Cap and shake hard for fifteen seconds.

Pour over the crushed coconut water ice and dot with the mole’ bitters. Add more coconut water ice to form a point on top.

Dot with more mole’ bitters.

Serve with a funky straw (and never more than one per hour, please!).


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